November 06, 2008

Race, curtain fabric and the Campbell's Kids

Since Tuesday night, many people have been asking me what Henry thinks of it all; i.e. a black man winning the presidency. The answer is "not much."

We watched the returns together -- I figured it was more important than his grammar homework that night. They declared Obama the winner and started panning the faces of the huge crowd gathered at the park in Chicago. Just like Kathi D and so many others, I just burst into sobs and couldn't stop. Henry mistook my tears for sadness and sat patting my back, saying "It's OK, mom." I told him that I was crying with joy, and tried to explain the significance of the event. While I talked, Henry's eyes welled up and tears started rolling down his face. I asked him why he was crying, and he answered through his sobs, "I don't know!" When mom cries, kids cry.

The fact that Obama's win holds little meaning for Henry is understandable and certainly positive in many ways. He's only nine, and has no reason to believe it's out of the ordinary. In our little city, we have less than 1% black residents, many of which are, like Henry, adopted kids of white parents. He's had no significant exposure to black cultural or racial issues. But is that good? Or should I make him aware of the racial context he's certain to face?

I think it's naive to say his color doesn't matter and won't affect him throughout his life, and wonder how to best prepare him. Many experts say to wait until he asks about it, but so far he's never brought it up; it's always been me. From when he was a baby, I made a point of having black and African music, art and books in our home. I colored in the all-white faces in his books with a brown pencil, and scrutinized birthday cards, posters, curtain fabric, cartoons and decorations for multi-culti scenes. I wonder if I'm over-emphasizing the issue, and certainly it seems he couldn't care less. But you never know what messages are sent and received.

What are your thoughts? I'd love to hear.

Campbellssoupkids

Where's my brown pencil?


November 01, 2008

A Poly Sci perspective

I normally stay away from politics in this blog to avoid flaming spammers, and anyway, it's probably pretty obvious where my political philosophy lies, but I did want to share this editorial from the Harvard Crimson. (Note the author's name, hint, hint.)

Looking Backward and Forward from Election Day, 2008
PUBLISHED ON 10/31/2008 3:09:03 AM

Most American voters appear to support Barack Obama for the presidency. The fact that the presumed winner is a young man with little national governing experience, a middle name shared with a notorious villain, and a last name only one letter away from that of the United States’ public enemy number one is extraordinary. Add to that, of course, that his mother is white and his father African, so our presumed next president will be nonwhite, or even “black.”

Unsurprising as these observations are, it still seems worthwhile to underscore just how astonishing this outcome will be if it occurs. Here are a few facts that might help those under age 25 understand better why those of us over age 50 are walking around with dropped jaws.

In my lifetime, blacks in some southern communities were in grave physical danger if they did not step off the sidewalk when a white person approached them. During my childhood, Virginia’s governor and many educators closed entire public school systems for years so that schools could not be desegregated. When I was in my teens, black and white activists were murdered for trying to ensure the franchise for black citizens. As recently as my young adulthood, three-fourths of whites agreed in a national survey that “blacks shouldn’t push themselves where they’re not wanted.”

The idea that a black man would within a few decades be elected president with strong white support would have seemed ludicrous to the Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. just as much as to Malcolm X or George Wallace.

Almost as astonishing to people of a certain age is the fact that Obama’s main rival in the Democratic primaries was a woman. Here too it is worth recalling a few facts to remind those under 25 how much the world has changed since their faculty were young.

In my teens, a best-selling book, “The Feminine Mystique,” amazed and shocked readers by asserting that women were not fully satisfied by submerging their identities completely in the wishes and actions of their husbands and children. When I entered college, women’s dormitories had housemothers, midnight curfews, open-door requirements for dorm rooms, and sign-in sheets for male guests. When I entered graduate school, the female students held their annual meeting to inform newcomers which male faculty could be trusted always, sometimes, or never (we took careful notes). Just a few years later, a prominent professor wondered in a faculty meeting if female graduate students were like the wolf children of Avignon, and never would overcome their unsatisfactory childhood socialization. Over a third of both men and women agreed in the General Social Survey as late as 1974 that “women should take care of running their homes and leave running the country up to men”

No wonder that we cannot stop reading political blogs, obsessing about the newest poll, and struggling to find something in the political science literature to explain this election.

Questions remain, of course, about the long-term impact of Obama’s presumed election. Here are a few that will keep me busy in research and teaching:

How much of Obama’s ability to obtain whites’ support was due to his unusual racial heritage—the grandparents from Kansas, the father in the United States on a student visa, the visible and unembarrassed biraciality? Is it now possible that white voters will be equally enthusiastic about an African American candidate descended from slaves?

Will Obama be constrained to maintain a race-neutral political and policy persona in order to keep other minorities’ and whites’ support? After being elected, if he is, can he discuss illegal immigration, the achievement gap, black male incarceration, or affirmative action without alienating too many voters? More generally, can he talk openly about racism, nativism, and structural impediments to nonwhites’ success, along with talking about parental responsibility and personal excellence?

Might an Obama presidency “push the prospect of a Latino Democrat getting elected further into the future than it would have been otherwise,” as one scholar has observed in an e-mail listserv? More generally, how will political coalitions or, conversely, electoral competition among people of color be affected by an Obama presidency?

How will daily interactions between whites and nonwhites change? Will there be less discriminatory treatment in jobs, health care, education, or the criminal justice system? Conversely, will people of color see racial consciousness as more optional and less necessary, so that their identity as an economic conservative or stamp collector can come to the fore?

Might the worst-off blacks (say, young men in inner cities) be just as badly off, or even worse off in relative terms, under a Democratic administration that “spreads the wealth around?” That is, even if the top four economic quintiles, say, are made better off over the next few years, can those gains reach down into the few American communities that are deeply poor, dangerous, ill-educated, jobless, and isolated?

Even Barack Obama will not solve all of America’s problems of race, class, and gender in the United States over the next few years. Nevertheless, we can pause to savor how far our nation has come in recent decades, before tackling the huge and fascinating questions that lie before us as students, scholars, and citizens.

Jennifer Hochschild is the Henry LaBarre Jayne Professor of Government , Professor of African and African American Studies, and Harvard College Professor.

August 29, 2008

Suburbutopia

[I suppose Bend isn't really the suburbs, but life sure looks and feels like it.]

Popsicle_2

We did our annual ease-back-into-school mode with the "Meet the Teacher" event at Henry's school this afternoon. The kids see their new classrooms, check out their teachers and eat popsicles from the PTA. We  catch up from the summer and plan playdates and carpools for flag football practice.

I enjoy the rhythms of life in this town. They're very pleasant and comfortable; like living here in general. I feel vaguely embarrassed that life is so easy for us, though. Must be my liberal guilt. Enjoy the benefits, but feel kinda bad about it. 

But boy, we're a white bunch here. Another transracial adoptive mom and I were looking around to see if there were any new non-white kids, as we know every one of the other eight black kids there, including our own. (This is out of an 800-student public school.) We got very excited to see a black mom - the only one I've seen in Bend. We're progressing!

Yes, I know, race doesn't matter, blah blah, but I can't imagine being in the one percent minority in grade school. Doesn't seem to bother Henry though.

Not much bothers Henry, except when they run out of popsicles. Hope it stays that way.

August 09, 2008

The Donation Olympics

Puddledolympicrings As the Olympics medals count begins, I'm going to run a donation count, sending money to various organizations that support international human rights, ending hunger, the environment, the Tibet and Darfur struggles, The Sichuan earthquake victims and the Special Olympics.

Today's Olympics donation is to savedarfur.org.

The opening ceremony,which I normally find tacky and trite, was a mind-blowing mix of conceptual art, military-like choreography, film special effects, historical opera and patriotic pageant. I must admit that the spectacle of the 2000 precision drummers was a little scary. Hordes of mechanistic marching soldiers came to mind, but maybe that was just me.

Meanwhile, Henry has found the 100% 24/7 Olympics channel, so we're plugged in day and night. We just watched a badminton match. Now women's weightlifting. It's going to be a long month.

(image courtesy of www.brownielocks.com)

August 07, 2008

Here's a solution

Now I can watch and feel virtuous at the same time! Letter from International Campaign for Tibet:

Dear Melissa,

I recently wrote to you about an exciting opportunity we've been given to help the people of Tibet: a generous ICT donor has agreed to match all contributions that we receive — dollar for dollar — up to a total of $100,000!

Starting tomorrow, world attention will be focused on the Beijing Olympics.  Despite the official story most of us will see on television, we know there is an additional truth that cannot be ignored — that tensions in China are at an all-time high and Tibetans are paying the price. Please send a generous gift today, so we can make the most of this remarkable opportunity to help.

Make a gift today — and it will have double the impact for the people of Tibet.

Since March and April — when entire towns across Tibet rose up in protest against almost a half century's worth of Chinese oppression — the crackdown by Chinese authorities has been brutal. But even before the protests, Tibetans were suffering injustices every day that Westerners would consider appalling:
* The Chinese government detains and often imprisons Tibetans for "splittest" activities like owning a Tibetan flag or offering a prayer for the health of the Dalai Lama.
* The Chinese have a clear history of torturing Tibetan political prisoners they have detained without charge.
* Tibetan monks and nuns are sometimes forced by Chinese authorities to sign statements denouncing their beloved spiritual leader, the Dalai Lama.
* Chinese border guards have shot at and even killed unarmed Tibetans — including children — as they flee across the border to the freedom of Nepal and India.
The International Campaign for Tibet needs every dollar of this match to help Tibetans — and this is your opportunity to make your gift go twice as far. Please don't delay. Make a generous gift today.

Thank you for standing in defense of human rights and democratic freedoms for Tibetans.
ict_dl_ackerly Sincerely,
ict_dl_sig
John Ackerly
President
International Campaign for Tibet

Olympics - to watch or not?

Olympics       

The Olympics start tomorrow, and I'm weirdly anxious about whether to "support" by watching or not.

The opening ceremony and most of the coverage is a mind-numbingly boring network spinfest, IMHO. But the actual sports moments are moving, exciting and real.

China is a repressive state who blatantly stomps on human rights. (But so do we, frankly. Gitmo, anyone?) The crackdown in Tibet is getting more vicious by the day, they have ruined their environment and continue to do so despite their supposed reforms, they have made a sham of free trade, and they have not only ignored the Darfur conflict, they're supplying arms to support it.

But what does that have to do with us turning on the TV for some sports entertainment?

My watching or not will have zero impact on China or the networks, who've already gotten their advertising dollars for these games. Since I'm not a Nielsen household, my actions won't even affect future ratings. So what's the point? Taking a moral (but meaningless) stand? Better to stop buying Chinese-made merchandise; nearly impossible but somewhat economically relevant.

Is it better to support and pressure change from within, which our govt is supposedly doing?  A convenient excuse for knuckling under China's economic clout.

Henry loves the whole shebang, as most kids do. To him it's an innocent, entertaining, exciting time. Do I bring up the confusing political issues or let him watch happily?

How are you approaching the games? Supporting, boycotting, don't care? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

July 01, 2008

On top of Old Smoky

Comin' to y'all from the Great Smokies - Appalachian country, mountaineer territory and all,

IMG_0069

I'm not a fan of the South. It's hot, muggy, and there are a lot of bugs; many of which fly, and most of which bite. Oh, well, what we do for family.

Though the real South doesn't think of western North Carolina as the south - more like hillbilly country, as well as a lovely place to send the kids to camp. To a Floridian, it's cool and mild here in the summer, god help them.

Some highlights so far:
The Curb Market. This is a low building with vendors' stalls (kind of like a mountain version of Pike's Place Market) that I like to visit. The primary merchandise consists of jams, preserves, honey, etc.; birds' nests (couldn't tell you why); bad crafts and rag rugs. The rugs are woven from the leftovers from the tube sock factory in the vicinity, so they wear like iron. Here's a very nice lady who sold me a few, woven herself.

Mrs. LedbetterMrs. Ledbetter

I feel like a true alien here. I have to ask people to repeat themselves several times before I understand them. This is the center of slow talk. I mean really slow. It's amazing.

It's very religious here, of course. Churches everywhere, and random signs like this.

IMG_0070

I always like the juxtaposition of the cross and the Confederate flag, the symbol of white supremacy and human slavery. I was too chicken to stop and take the photo properly, so I took it through the windshield by the side of the road.

Tomorrow the hordes arrive for the three days of chaos, yelling and arguments that we call our family reunion. Do I sound excited?  Everyone else seems to enjoy it though. Hello, family who's reading this: I love each of you individually and enjoy your company. It's when you all get together that's kind of overwhelming. Just saying.

June 18, 2008

convergence???

travel electronics
Are you kidding me? This doesn't even include the laptop upon which I'm typing. Where is this convergence the industry keeps hyping? They still can't make an adequate universal charger.

June 03, 2008

top ten tuesday

Ten phrases I hope never to hear again:Dictionary_2

1. Ping me  As in: "Ping me next week and I'll give you an update."   Contact, call, email.

2. Populate the form factor  As in: "Once we get the layout determined, we just have to populate the form factor." Write the copy.

3. In my silo  As in: "Sales training is not in my silo; you need to talk to Charlie."  Area, department, responsibility.

4. Long pole [of the tent]  As in: "Obtaining the permits is the long pole in this build-out." Longest lead time.

5. Ideate As in: "Let's set up a conference call and ideate on this." Come up with ideas, brainstorm.

6. Socialize As in "I'll take this recommendation back and socialize it."  Send around for review.

7. OOO  As in "Ping me Monday on this as I'm OOO til then."  Out Of Office.

8. Day Alpha  As in "We need to get this accomplished by Day Alpha."  Launch date.

9. Bandwidth  As in "My department doesn't have the bandwidth for that right now."  Capacity, resources.

And last but not least;
10. Surplus  As in "Employees who are notified of surplus will receive severance."  Laid off.

May 27, 2008

The Out-of-Coffee Cafe

Beans_5 Memorial Day afternoon a friend and I went out to lunch at a newish well-reviewed cafe in town. It's a breakfast/lunch place with the trappings of a fancy-casual restaurant: wines on a rack, water in a carafe, spendy prices. It was about half full, but it became apparent that they were at the end of a busy 3-day weekend. The wait staff were a bit disorganized, but we're used to that in Bend. The food and wine took forever to arrive, but we're pretty used to that as well, and we were in a nice spot outside. Unfortunately, they were out of two of their five sides. A little disappointing, but ok. The sandwiches were not very ok, which was really disappointing, as they were about $10 each. But anyway, on with the point of my story.

While we were eating, we heard a waiter tell some new arrivals that the kitchen was a little backed up, so "take your time deciding." Then I thought I heard him say that they were out of coffee. I was pretty sure I misunderstood him, but about 10 minutes later another party sat down and were told the same thing. Now, without naming names, this cafe is directly opposite one of our best grocery stores and is right next door to our fancy organic one. Across the street are TWO coffee shops, one of which roasts its own beans on the premises. Couldn't somebody run over and buy a couple of pounds of coffee??? Come on, it's a breakfast place. Ya gotta have coffee!

I relate this story not to be mean-spirited - I'm sure they were slammed all weekend. But it's emblematic of why so many businesses fail: the inability to plan ahead, think creatively, take responsibility for decisions and take some action to enhance the customers' experience. Never mind enhance, meet their basic expectations. These little trendy restaurants come and go all the time around here in continual turnover. All that planning, investment, remodeling, stocking and training, but they're out of beans and can't go get some.

May 20, 2008

the square peg

IMG_0004

Raising a child who has a different way of perceiving and interacting with the world is clearly tough. Doing it alone can be agonizing. H is extremely energetic and talkative and often has a hard time focusing (yes, we know the diagnosis). He's incredibly smart and funny and imaginative, but his active mind doesn't mesh well with linear tasks.

It's so clear to me and others who know him that he's going to accomplish something great in life. But he has to get through third grade, and right now, his personality is too big for a class of 25 kids. Last night we had another heart-to-heart, with tears on both sides. I tried to explain the square peg in the round hole. The square peg is perfect in its squareness but needs to try to squeeze into that hole sometimes as best it can. It's not that it's better for him, really, it's for the convenience of the rest of society. I never understood that until I had a square peg of my own.

His way is the right way for him. It's where creativity and genius live. But he has to be able to sit quietly in his seat to "succeed." So to accomplish that, it's recommended that we medicate his exuberance. Which breaks my heart.

Badger Cam!

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